It’s Time To Redefine Yourself With Empowering Labels

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What Are Labels?

Labels are everywhere. We see them in the supermarket when we shop for groceries. They are attached to the Amazon packages we are delighted to retrieve when they are delivered to our homes. They are fastened on medicine bottles giving us warnings and cautions.

There are also labels that are affixed to people. Although they are not physically glued to our bodies, they do exist in words or phrases that we have either stuck on ourselves or that have been placed on us by others. Labels are usually attributed to a person’s personality, appearance, intelligence, behavior, or cultural background.

The purpose of labels is to identify, describe, classify, categorize, or give information about something. When we want information about goods and services, these details could be very useful. The problem with personal labels is they tend to be subjective and biased. When labels are created based on personal perception, the tendency is for people to focus on negative or derogatory traits, which holds us back in several ways. Whether it be from taking risks, making connections, or progressing forward– the effects of such labels can hinder joy and growth. Characterizations based on opinions and feelings lack the vantage point of a person’s overall nature.

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How the Brain Creates Labels

If someone were to ask you to describe yourself, would you share your synopsis quickly and reactively? In other words, are those words or phrases that you associate with yourself automatically regurgitated without contemplation? Are they so engrained in your mind that you just impulsively respond with answers?

The brain is such a paradox– it could either be your biggest cheerleader or your harshest opponent. In the human brainstem there is a two-inch long network of neurons at the end of the brain stem called the reticular activating system (RAS). The RAS filters sensory information it deems relevant and brings it to the forefront of your awareness. Usually you brand yourself with certain labels based on incidents that have occurred in your life. Your RAS has picked and chosen which circumstances in your life were worthy of magnification. Whether it was something that directly happened to you and made you think or feel a particular way or if it was from a comment someone may have said to you– your RAS has bookmarked certain pleasurable and disheartening moments in your life. Highlighting feel-good circumstances can create empowering labels such as, “I’m hard-working”; conversely, emphasis on a difficult memory can produce discouraging labels like, “I’m lazy.”

The good news is that labels are not permanent and you can actually “trick” your RAS into regarding new, redefined labels as being pertinent. Life is a journey–circumstances are always changing–and you can remove any and all demoralizing identifiers and create new, empowering ones instead.

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How To Create Empowering Labels- 3 Steps

1. Identify your current labels

I encourage you to either deeply ponder or write down the answers to the following questions. It is important to be totally honest when answering. Your responses may evoke feelings of shame, embarrassment, sadness, or even anger. That’s okay and totally normal! You have to dig deep to unearth the negative in order for it to be cast aside and replaced with the positive.

• What are positive things about my appearance? 
• What are negative things about my appearance? 
• What are positive things about my personality? 
• What areas of my personality need improvement? 
• What do I think about my intelligence? 
• What do I think about my work ethic? 
• How would other people describe me? 
• If I could describe myself with one word, what would it be?
• If I could change something about myself, what would I change? 

2. Self-Reflect and Redefine

Now that you have answered the questions, take this opportunity to identify your strengths, values, and achievements. Reflect on what you admire about yourself and what others appreciate about you. You have qualities that bring value to the world!

Now, look at those answers that yielded a critical analyses of who you perceive yourself to be. Are there things that you can do to change those characteristics or traits? If so, what could you do? Would things improve if you implemented those changes? How would your life change if you made such changes? Really ponder these questions and see if you can come up with a realistic plan that, if utilized, would improve the current way you view yourself.

Some of your unfavorable answers may be attributes that are out of your control to change. To redefine a label that would either be impossible or too difficult to change you have to replace your current one with positive and empowering language. Choose words that highlight your strengths and potential rather than focusing on what you wish you had, limitations, or past mistakes. For example, I look in the mirror and see my long nose. I can’t change that attribute without a nose job, and that’s not an option for me. Rather than keeping my self-proclaimed label of “big nose,” I can create a new label such as “unique nose”, which puts a positive spin on what I consider a flaw. Another tactic in recreating labels is to change any cynical words with positive language instead. Below are some examples of changing some negative labels into empowering labels:

• I’m stupid. –> I am learning and growing.
• I’m not good enough. –> I am worthy of love and success.
• I’m ugly. –> I am unique and beautiful.
• I’m a failure. –> I am determined.
• I’m weak. –> I am strong and capable.

3. Affirm and Apply

Affirm and proclaim these positive labels consistently through self-talk and/or written notes. The more you repeat them to yourself in a confident and authentic manner, the more you convince your RAS into believing they are indisputable facts. And eventually they become just that– when you fully believe them to be true.

Apply your new labels into everyday life. If your label is actionable, do something that reinforces your new definition. Actions provide tangible proof of your personal growth. If your reframed label pertains to external characteristics, seize each day with confidence and comfort in your own skin. (Quick story- When I was in high school I was friends with a boy who was well-liked, but never particularly popular with the ladies. Then one day, he told our group of friends that he was going to talk about himself the way he wanted to be seen. He would carry a picture of Leonardo DiCaprio in his wallet [this was during the height of the movie, Titanic] and would tell people jokingly that it was him. His whole demeanor change in the way he carried himself and, believe it or not, he started attracting the interest of our fellow female classmates.)

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By following these steps, you can create positive labels that enhance your self-esteem, motivation, and overall well-being. Other people or those pesky, negative thoughts should not define who you are. There is only one person who should create the internal blueprint of who you are– YOU!